


Toasts

by Veggie_chips



Category: Sekai-ichi Hatsukoi
Genre: Crack, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, M/M, One Shot, Sex Jokes, just two boys joking around, marriage jokes, talking bout exs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-23
Updated: 2017-01-23
Packaged: 2018-09-19 09:53:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,568
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9434786
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Veggie_chips/pseuds/Veggie_chips
Summary: After a business party Takano's car breaks down, so him and Ritsu have to just wait for their mechanic. While they wait they start to joke around about the future.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I did not edit this, so sorry.  
> I just wanted to write them joking around  
> I will publish chapters for my other stories soon/someday

Takano and Ritsu were on a secluded road, In takano’s car, driving home from a company party when a mechanical roar came from under the car’s hood. It was accompanied by small puff of smoke and clunking noises.

“What was that? Is that bad? Should we be worried?” Ritsu panicked.

“Calm down,” Takano tried to soothe him, “I’m sure it’s nothing.”

They pulled into a back road and they parked on shoulder of the street. Ritsu waited in the car looking for a mechanic's number, while Takano took a look at the problem. Takano came back a moment later a plopped back down into the driver's seat. 

“Well, I have no clue what it is, but it’s not good.” Takano rubbed his temples.

“The mechanic says he can pick up the car, but we would have to find a ride home.” Ritsu informed him. “Maybe Mino or Kisa could pick us up.”

“That works, you call the mechanic back and I’ll call one of them.” 

They both made their separate calls, then reported to each other.

“The mechanics gonna be here in twenty minutes.” 

“And kisa’s gonna pick us up in thirty” Takano added “So now we just wait.”

The two sat there in silence for a minute or two before Takano started digging around in the back seat.

“What are you looking for?” Ritsu gave in and asked. Instead of answering Takano grabbed what he was searching for a brought it into the front driver’s seat. It was a 12 pack of beer. 

“Beer? Why do you have that in your car?”

“It was in my groceries.”

“Didn’t you have enough to drink at the party?”

“I was driving so I didn't drink, besides these are for both of us.” Ritsu gave him look, “Relax I'm not trying to drug you, I just don't wanna sit here for a half an hour in uncomfortable silence.” 

Ritsu didn't want that either so he reluctantly accepted a can. He didn't drink too much though, just sipped, cause he didn't want be completely wasted In front of the mechanic, or worse, Kisa. 

“You know Ritsu we worked really well together fixing this car situation.”

“Yeah?” Ritsu replied confused where this was going

“Yeah, we were like a married couple.” Ritsu scoffed.

“...or like co-workers, Takano. You know the thing that we are.”

“We could be a married couple, you kn-”

“No” Ritsu quickly interrupted, taking another sip of his drink. 

“Aw come on, we would be gorgeous married couple. Just think about the wedding: gold and green decoration, I’d wear black and you’d wear white. Everyone would cry.”

“I’m thinking about the wedding and all I can imagine is you saying something sexual in the toast then my parents disowning me.”

“Sexual? Me? In wedding speech? I’d never,” He took a long swig of his drink, “but if I did it would be so hilarious that you’d forgive me and marry me anyway.”

“I don’t see how that could be funny.”

“Really, then I’ll have to prove it.” he pondered for a moment, looking as if he was really thinking about something important, “Got it. I’m sorry Ritsu couldn’t speak today, we all know how choked up he can get. However I’ve never seen him this choked up without my dick being involved.” 

“Boo, that was lame,” Ritsu giggled anyway, but only a little.

“I’d like to see you try.” The challenge was issued so Ritsu accepted. He sat for a moment trying to think of puns or anything that would work, until eventually he excitedly turned back to face his boss and raised his beer can as if he was making a toast. 

“Relationships are constantly evolving, they are always different. What started off in a school library became twice in the car, a storage closet, many different hotel rooms, and once in public restroom.”

Takano let out a loud bellow of a laugh, he did not expect Ritsu to even participate let alone say something so out of character. RItsu looked proud of himself for making Takano chuckled, he had never really done that on purpose before. 

“Alright, alright, that was good. I want a rematch.” Takano smirked, this might be a fun night after all.

“Your on.”

“Hows this one for you,” Takano cleared his throat as if he was about to say something very important. “When I saw Ritsu again for the first time, he blushed so much that I decided he was either cute or a total virgin. However I had to settle on cute, since I had already taken his virginity ten years prior.”

“You didn’t even try on that one, come on.” Ritsu came to realization, “I think I might actually be better at this than you.”

“That would be first,” Takano deadpanned, forcing Ritsu hit him on the arm. 

“Be like that mister big shot, but I’m just gonna toast the hell out of our fake wedding.”

“One of us is drunk, cuase that sounded insane.” 

“It’s probably me,” RItsu took another drink, 

“Do you think I could beat up your ex’s?”

“What?”

“If we invite any of your ex’s to our wedding, I will probably have to fight them for your hand in marriage. So it’s important to know that I could take ‘em”

“That’s ridiculous”

“Does you avoiding the question mean, that you got some crazy strong ex I should worry about?”

“That's absu-” Ritsu huffed, “Actually yeah I do have a pretty strong ex”

“Oh?”

“Yeah for like a month in college I dated this girl that was really into bodybuilding. She wasn’t really into to me that much though, that was fine. Really, she just kinda needed someone to prove to her family she was straight and I needed someone to prove to myself I was straight. So it was convenient.” 

“I won’t be needing to fight her, is what your saying?”

“No, actually she married one of my other ex-girlfriends.”

“So, you like, turn everyone you date gay.”

“I do not! They were gay when I got there!”

“You turned ME gay”

“YOU WERE GAY WHEN I GOT THERE!”

There was a knock on the car window, RItsu turned to see a very uncomfortable mechanic standing just outside his car door.

///////////////////////////////////////////////////

 

Takano waved as the mechanic towed his car away, leaving them on the side of the road. RItsu had put on his gloves even though the weather was chilly at best. They stopped drinking, not wanting to embarrass themselves when Kisa arrived. RItsu and Takano stood next to each other in total silence for awhile, not sure how to get back to their previous momentum. 

Instead of speaking Takano just reached out to Ritsu’s hand, taking it in his own. At first the shorter man looked surprised, but he didn’t object, only accepted the sign of affection with a slight blush. 

“I think I have another idea for a wedding toast,” Takano finally said.

“Oh? Still trying to keep up with me?” Ritsu teased, more meekly than before. 

“When I met Ritsu I fell for him hard, so hard that even after a kick to the head and ten years of heartbreak I still feel my heart beat twice as fast when he smiles.” RItsu looked at him, confused by how genuine Takano sounded, “That’s why I want to spend ten years and longer trying making him smile.”

“I don’t get the joke,” Ritsu stared at the taller man, his heart fluttering against his own wishes. 

“No joke,” He turned to look at RItsu, “That’s what I’d say at our real wedding, you know so your parents don’t disown you. Well it’s a rough draft, I can change, it’s just what's been stuck in my head all night wh-”

RItsu interrupted, by putting his hand on the other man's cheek and kissing him tenderly. That toast was just enough to overwhelm RItsu, he was always surprised when Takano revealed himself as a sentimental sap. Ritsu pulled away looking into the other’s surprised eyes.

“It wasn’t too bad I guess,” Ritsu almost whispered. Takano quickly pulled him back into a sweet kiss, but it didn’t last long before, for second time that night, they were interrupted by a very uncomfortable man. 

“Ahhh guys?” Kisa said, obviously shocked. They looked back at him, equally as shocked. They stood there for silence for just a moment.

“It’s not what it looked like!” Ritsu broke the silence, pushing himself off of his boss.

“Oh my god,” Kisa didn’t seem to hear him, “HOW LONG HAVE YOU TO BEEN SLEEPING TOGETHER! ARE yOU TWO IN LOVE! RITTCHAN WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME!”

Kisa quickly gasped and ran over to Ritsu, grabbing his wrist. He said in a hushed voice hoping Takano wouldn’t hear, “Is he making you do this to get ahead at work? Cause it’s not worth it, trust me! They always lie, Rittchan!” 

“NO, no, no! It’s not like that, Kisa, I swear!”

“The fuck Kisa, what kinda monster do you think I am?!” Takano yelled, scandalised.

“THE KIND THAT'S FORCING POOR RITTY TO KISS YOU ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!” 

“Kisa! WE ARE DATING,” RItsu blurted out, “I’m not sleeping with him cause he’s the boss, god!”

Kisa paused and looked intensely at the two of them, “Awwww! Congratulations! You have to tell me everything!” 

Ritsu looked exhaustively at Takano, he was going to need another drink.

**Author's Note:**

> was this a waste of time? probaly, but hey can't UNwrite it


End file.
